Almost any marriage can be the victim of infidelity and cheating. It happens all the time that the husband isn’t feeling like all his needs are being met inside the marriage… and then, he has to go outside the marriage to satisfy his needs.
Even though you might feel deeply hurt, jealous and betrayed… you might still want to repair your marriage and not go through a nasty divorce. If you still have very strong feelings towards your cheating husband who was having an affair behind your back, you might still want to give it a new try. But before you can start working on the marriage there are a few steps you have to go through in order to make it work.
Husband Affair – Disbelief
The first reaction a person gets when finding out that their husband is cheating on them is shock and denial. You can’t believe it to be true; you feel one of the most powerful degrees of jealousy and anger towards both the cheating husband and the person he is having an affair with. In order to get past this you have to accept that this has happened and you must not go into denial. If you deny it and don’t accept the fact that your husband was having an affair, you can never move past it.
As you start accepting that this has truly happened and your husband has cheated on you, rage will start taking over your body and mind. You feel absolutely enraged at your husband and the one he is having an affair with. This is something you have to deal with and let it pass, because it will. If you don’t let this stage pass and instead act upon it… you will probably want revenge. This is not a good thing if you still want to continue the marriage and not lose it forever.
You might feel like the only way to even the score is to cheat on your husband with someone else or by seducing the husband/boyfriend of his mistress. I strongly advise you not to do any of these because as this rage passes (which it will) you will quickly realize what a terrible mistake you’ve done and at that point the marriage is often beyond saving.
Husband Affair – Repair
After you’ve started to let go of this anger, it’s time for repairing. Here you will need the full support of your cheating husband and also you will need him to be 100% committed to making the marriage work again. He has to answer the questions that you have the right to know and most importantly he has to prove to you that you can trust him. This is a very long process which will take a lot of effort from both of you but unless you talk about these things with complete honesty, you will not be able to save the marriage.
No matter what the case is, the first thing your cheating husband has to prove to you is that he won’t have any contact with the person he was having an affair with anymore. If you can’t get him to do that, trust will probably never be regained.